Carlos the Jackal does not read Forsyth

“Carlos the Jackal,” a political terrorist who is a real person who murdered real people, but who the fictional character Jason Bourne tried to stop fictionally, was:

(a) Renamed Carlos in adulhood, possibly as a code name. His birth name is Ilyich. Yes, after the I in V.I. Lenin.

(b) Given the nickname “the Jackal” by a journalist who thought Ilyich owned a copy of The Day of the Jackal by Frederick Forsyth – but he didn’t. It was somebody else’s book that just happened to be nearby his stuff. He probably never read that book! Which outrages me because it is a very good book! He does not deserve to be called the jackal.

Schneider says: It’s also a good nickname. Like a really good one.

Rex: Luckily he wasn’t named while in a food line. Carlos the Schnitzel is catchy, though.

Alex: Carlos the Superdog with onions and relish does not strike terror in my heart.

Maria: Unless you suffer debilitating heartburn. In which case, that Superdog is life-size, wearing a catsup-red jumpsuit, sitting with you in the back seat of a cab slapping you upside the head while the driver pays no notice.